Conversations With Kids: Peeing in the Dishwasher


As I was rinsing dirty dishes this evening, something happened. Something…unexpected? Funny? Strange? Memorable? Yes, “memorable” — that’s what I’ll go with.

The girls were playing in the middle of the kitchen floor with some assorted toys and crayons. It was just after dinner, so they were down to only diapers in preparation for a bath. As I was washing away at the sink, I glanced back and noticed that E.V. had taken off her diaper. (For the third time today.) I chose to ignore it since they were only a few minutes from soaking in the tub anyway. I went back to rinsing dishes when I saw E.V. sidle up to me. She hopped onto the open dishwasher door (which she always tries to sneak and do because she thinks it’s fun to grab the dishes out of the top rack), and as I turned to reprimand her, she squatted and peed. SHE PEED. MY TODDLER PEED IN THE DISHWASHER.

Honestly, I didn’t know how to react. Let’s just say this was something no parenting book I’ve ever read covered. ;) I managed to pick my jaw back up off the ground while simultaneously keeping myself from laughing.

Me: E.V.! Don’t go pee pee in the dishwasher! {words I never in a million years imagined saying, BTW}

E.V.: No, Mommy, I poopy in dishwasher! (Thank God she was exaggerating.)

 Sigh. Needless to say my dish washing was cut short for bath time.

On the way to the bathroom with the girls on my hips, I noticed some reddish stains on the carpet. Since we had pizza for dinner, I grumbled internally about E.V. somehow managing to get sauce all the way in the living room. (It wouldn’t be her first feat of magic when it comes to producing messes.) I chose to ignore the spot for the task at hand, but once the girls were in their pajamas, I noticed something on Cricket’s ear. Blood! Who knows how my seven month-old managed to scratch her outer ear and then crawl with her head apparently on the carpet downstairs without my  noticing, but that’s pretty much what happened. Double sigh. Did I mention that we just cleaned the carpets on Sunday. And did I mention that Ryan’s traveling today? (Of course he is! ;) )

You’ll have to forgive my random pictures to go with this post. They’re random one-offs but I figured that a pee-soaked dishwasher and a bloody carpet wouldn’t make for the best images to lodge in you minds before you fall asleep. Ha! :P

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